old friend

she was there the day i took the admission test to get into my school. into first grade. we sat for that test together and made it through. we were in the same section that year and thus a friendship blossomed - my first one ever.

i was a quiet child at 5.5 years. she was not. she was flamboyant, talkative and dominating. i was a good foil for her... good at following orders, docile and ever eager to play along. she watched out for me like a child watches out for a puppy or a kitten.

she was the one who gave me first lessons about life, a completely twisted account of the birds and bees - when we were about 6 or 7. i think that may have traumatized me for life but i jest.

later when we hit puberty, she first and then me, our roles reversed. she became slightly quieter, i learned to roar. i became her savior then. she was still argumentative and nosey. but now if others messed with her and made her cry, i would go and fight her battles for her. her adversaries would have to go through me. i was taller than her and most others in class. and being overweight helped me in appearing more intimidating than i felt on the inside.

the day i lied about tb, she cried for me. the day i lied about transfering to a school in delhi, she cried for me. most other days since 8th grade she learned to give me a wide berth because i was always upto mischief and she's rather not be involved. and yet, when she got into fights with the other girls and they made her cry i would hear about it and go to her aid instantly. my other friends who hated her indiscreet nature gave me a hard time for my ties with her but knew well enough that i could not swayed to leave her side.

after 1992, we went to the same college, different departments. never once did we call each other or hang out in school. she got married in a years time, had a son soon after - her world got farther and farther removed from mine. and yet, two years later the day her dad died in a road accident, oni called me and i rushed to her side. she cried again that day and looked at me imploringly to set things right. i stood there shaking unable to help her like i was used to. i couldn't bear to look at her then. we never saw each other again.

...

until sunday night. we sat up till 4 am swapping stories. she as loud and indiscreet as ever and me smiling in sweet relief. because she remembered everything the way i remembered it. she recounted for her husband how i stood up for her all those years when not many liked her. how loyal i was. how unwavering. the way i would go rushing to people and demand: eka kantesey kano?? kay okey ki bolsey???

...

you can do a lot for people and have your own precious memories, but when they remember years and years later, you have something to show for one sad-assed life.